Linda posted in our private group the other day. She asked "How am I going to deal with my grief when I'm having such a hard time understanding how to carry on?"

This is a really good question and I get it. I asked the same question when I was struggling too. As you know, dealing with grief by itself can be a difficult and painful experience. And when you're trying to figure out how to carry on at the same time - it can be a lot.

Let's lean in to the first part of the question -
One of the best ways to deal with the grief is to allow yourself to feel and express your emotions. When I lost Zoi, I didn't suppress my emotions. In fact, I gave myself permission to cry, and to feel what I needed to feel. Sometimes I cried for 2-hours at a time... I even had moments a year or two into this journey when I cried. I still cry 9 1/2 years later from time to time. Grief is just like that. And, maybe you're experiencing that right now too.

Here's the thing: It's really important to acknowledge and accept your emotions when you are grieving. They are what they are. And, it's ok to give yourself permission to feel whatever you are feeling and whenever you're feeling it - whether it's sadness, loneliness, fear about the future, or a mix of different emotions. It doesn't matter And, if you feel like your emotions are overwhelming you, then doing some diaphragmatic breathing can help very quickly to bring your emotional temperature down.

Some of the other ways to express your emotions can be in the form of journaling, talking to a trusted friend, a coach or a therapist about what you're feeling. Even a light walk or engaging in some creative activity like art or music can help, a lot too.

Now for the other other part of the question - everyone grieves differently, so please don't compare yourself to others or feel pressured to "move on" before you are ready. There is no timeline for your grief.

We can't take all of the steps at once. we can only take the next step in front of us. Focus on the here and now, stay present and by doing that, you are carrying on - one step at a time, one day at time. and sometimes, one moment at a time. It is carrying on and it's ok.


I hope this helps you Linda and everyone who's reading this post